I am announcing my resignation
It is my sad duty to tell you all that I must resign as a blogger. I realize that people look to me as a moral compass. My words and actions have shaped the minds of those who are young and impressionable. But my persona of ethical fortitude was a farce. I have led a secret life. A life of hideous conduct unbecoming of a blogger. I have engaged in activities of the utmost disgrace.
I, on a regular basis, have participated in tickle fights.
I realize that you are all shocked. I have no excuse for delighting in the tickling of other men. Perhaps “accidentally” brushing my hand against their genitals…and subsequently groping them. I have no excuse for giggling with glee as I was manhandled by grown adult males in animal costumes. I am addicted to tickling. I like to tickle others, and I like to be tickled. I blame my mother and her constant use of the “tickle monster” to make me smile as a child. I realize that if I hadn’t used a credit card to purchase the services of “Tickle Midgets Incorporated”…news of this scandal would have never leaked. But I didn’t have any cash and those little people are such darn good ticklers. I couldn’t help myself. Their short stature just makes it so easy for them to reach those hard to tickle areas. But, in a way, I’m glad this information was made public. It has forced me to face my tickle demons and commit to changing my tickling ways. After this post I will be checking into the Elmo Tickle Rehab Center. There I will receive the treatment I need to conquer this disease and lead a normal life once again. Again, I deeply, deeply apologize for failing you. I hope that some day you can find it in your heart to forgive me. Good bye everyone. Good luck in all that you do.
Froggie
