Frogspring 14: Alternate Reality!
A hot dog enthusiast asks…
You have, at various times, said that you feel like crap on a stick. Can you explain the difference between feeling like crap and feeling like crap on a stick? Is it better or worse? For example, I like hot dogs, but I LOVE Hot Dog on a Stick even more, just so long as you don’t put ketchup on it. Dirty Harry is right, no one puts ketchup on a hot dog.
Well, there is normal crap, which is unpleasant on its own, but crap on a stick means that it was so foul that you dare only touch it with a stick. But crap is the exception that proves the rule. Pretty much everything else, when put on a stick, is improved by a factor of 4. Hot dogs, corn dogs, rock candy, Nazis…all much better on a stick. I admit, I do like ketchup on my hot dogs and Nazis, so maybe don’t tell Harry that, k?
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Fuck dude, your site is pretty epic. =)
Fuck dude, thanks!
How old are you?
I’m 28 but I feel like I am 132.
Who won the caption contest?
The lovely Goops! She is somewhat new on my radar, but I’m very impressed with her posts so far. Also, she has wicked cool spectacles. Here is the pic and winning caption.
“I find this Ewok’s lack of eyeballs disturbing.”
Watching TV this morning I noticed something, Why the fuck did The Flintstones celebrate Christmas?
Analyzing Flinstones plot holes can be dangerous, man. If you think about them too much, you will end up not sleeping at night. The lack of sleep will cause insanity and the next thing you know you’ll end up in a padded room banging your head against the cushioned walls. Just to help you move on and give you some closure, I will fabricate a scenario to close the plot hole and satisfy your brain.
Quantum physics states that there are an infinite number of realities. Some are very close to this one, some are very different. The Flintstones actually take place in an alternate reality in which Christ was born 400 years previous to the series. When you see the date as 10,000 B.C. they are actually referring to the year crackers were invented. The Flinstones took place approximately 10,000 years Before Crackers. Okie doke?
I heard that they want to remove the B.C. and A.D. from the calenders. What do those initials stand for any way?
Wow. That is a crazy coincidence. For the answer to this, we must venture back into our reality. B.C., of course, means “Before Christ.” Unfortunately that is not perfectly accurate as Jesus may have been born as much as 18 years before he was born. But that’s just nitpicking.
For A.D. we must open our Latin text books to page 34. It stands for “Anno Domini” which is the abbreviated form of “Anno Domini Nostri Iesu Christi.” So when you convert all that to English you get “In the year of our Lord, Jesus Christ.” A.D. is a bit snappier.
What is the difference between a duck?
How about in the next frogspring you add on the second half of that question.
If i kiss you will you turn into a prince?
There was a problem with my Prince conversion forms. I accidentally checked the box for “Duke” instead. But hey, a Duke is nothing to sneeze at, right? And if you don’t want to kiss me, you can tickle me and I turn into a Count.
afternoonsnoozebutton writes…
Magic is so much more probable than downward acceleration at the rate of 9.5 m/sec^2 (gravity). Oh, and call me Hannah, since I don’t have a catchy name like Froggie (I’m definitely jealous).
Well, until I see a formula that shows how a rabbit gets pulled out of a hat, I’m sticking to my guns that magic keeps us stuck to the ground.
I could try to help you come up with a catchy name. Let me brainstorm here.
Snoozy? Buttons? Nooner? No…Nooner would be bad. Umm…how about I call you Hannah? That sounds reasonably catchy. Hello Hannah :)
