The Frogman
May 2011
Listen
Magic Carpet Ride - Steppenwolf
Has anyone ever taken oxycodone?
Should I expect any magic carpet rides?
April 2011
I AM GOING TO PASS OUT NOW
I AM COMMITTED TO SPARKLE MOTION
I AM THE DUCHESS OF CAMBRIDGE
They gave me painkillers
Did you know that these things get you a little high?
I did not.
From now on if you blog your boobs I will be calling them bloobs.
WOOOOOOOOOO
Bacon.
If I had gotten this infection in 1911, I probably would have died from it.
However, I wouldn’t have had to deal with antibiotics that evacuated my bowels at frequent inconvenient intervals.
Or the other antibiotics that made me pee orange.
No, seriously.
Cheeto orange.
I called it “Bear Grylls Tang.”
Wanna learn how to use a semi-colon?
Nah. I like to utilize my entire colon.
On the mend
Infection under control.
Wound attatched to wound sucking device.
Might be home tomorrow.
Also my hospital food is way worse than you’re hospital food.
Soooooooo bad.
[picture of me in hospital gown]
This iPod has no camera. Steve jobs didn’t think I was ready for that sort of responsibility yet. I can type about 2 words per minute. This has taken me 10 minutes to type. Very unpleasant night. No sleep and one mental breakdown. I have no clue when I can leave. Discovered a new abcess which probably means another surgery. I can’t say I’ve ever been so miserable for so long. Breakfast is here. Frogpatient signing off.
The beeping
Why does everything here beep all the time? Please stop beeping-things, I’m trying to sleep.
Tumblr app sucks trucknuts
