is it ok to stick my penis into a vat of molten steel as long as they promise to inject me with SARS after
Actually, you can dip your penis into molten steel and be unharmed. First you must dip it in some water and then insert your penis into the steel briefly. It won’t hurt a bit and you don’t even need SARS after. It’s called the Leidenfrost effect.
"The Leidenfrost effect is a phenomenon in which a liquid, in near contact with a mass significantly hotter than the liquid’s boiling point, produces an insulating vapor layer which keeps that liquid from boiling rapidly."
so you have a girl/boyfriend? That's awesome man, since when?
I do have a girl/boyfriend, but she might not like it if I called her that. And since…like…a while. 7 months? We have yet to pick an official start date. Right now it’s “June-ish.” She’s very smart and pretty and I looooooove her. Or I could be making her up. But I’m not. But I could be.
But I’m not.
She doesn’t want 20,000 people knowing her bidness, so I must keep her identity secret. Buttt…how about a picture of her nostril? Would that be enough proof?
The Chive >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> my neighbor's dog's turd >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> overweight, old and single basement-dweller fatty who lives with his mom.
TheCHIVE has lots of funny stuff on its site. So it is certainly greater than a dog’s turd. But the funny stuff is used unethically at times. So it kind of turds up peoples’ good work.
As for the other stuff you were mostly right, but you have a few facts incorrect. I am indeed overweight. I don’t believe 29 is technically “old.” Unless you are a fly, and then that is crazy old. I am not single. I do reside in a basement. My mom lives upstairs. None of these things do I find embarrassing under the circumstances. Personally, I would be more embarrassed if I had such familiarity with my neighbor’s dog poop.
Is this what passes for a sentence these days? I remember a time when people spelled out entire words and took the time to make a proper insult instead of using some modern cliche. And I don’t even understand what stylin’ means in this context. Are they better dressers than me? That’s probably true. This shirt I’m wearing cost 3 dollars. The truth is, I don’t care if the chive steals my shit. It bothers me more that they steal the shit of others who are starting out and could use the extra traffic. They don’t just leave things uncredited. They take the time to crop off watermarks and put on their own. Then if you try to contact them, they say their email is disabled because they get too much spam. If that is the case, they can make themselves a contact form with a captcha. They are not the first person to ever have a spam problem.
In the end, i would say theCHIVE has become successful mostly on the work of others and goes out of their way to not give credit to those who supply their content. Are they stylin’? Perhaps. But I know plenty of well dressed douchebags.
I’ve got some shit I need to do and it is eating away my energy normally reserved for bloggering. Trying to get qualified for gastric bypass surgery is a huge energy suck. Just filled out a 20 page form that I’m 90% sure they will not read or just skim.
I haven’t gone anywhere. Do not worry. As action star and governer Arnold Shwarzenegger would say…